love: an introduction
roses are sometimes red, violets are not always blue
Mmm, I'm a star
And the audience loves me
And I love them
And they love me for lovin' them
And I love them for lovin' me
And we love each other
And that's 'cause none of us got enough love in our childhoods
And that's showbiz, kid
Y’all, it’s finally February, and I wanna talk about love. So in celebration of Valentine’s Day and in alignment with my own masochism, I will be writing THREE newsletters on this 👏🏼 very 👏🏼 topic 👏🏼. These newsletters will explore platonic love, romantic love, and self-love, respectively. Have I tried to write a series of posts before? Yes! Did I follow through? Of course not. But something about the unseasonably warm weather and the erosion of democracy has me feeling up to the challenge. All you need is love, right? (Right?!)
Today’s newsletter is not one of the three but merely the announcement, a primer to get us in the mood.
frequently asked questions
Q: What is love?
A: Perhaps the truest response to that question comes from Haddaway: “Baby don’t hurt me/don’t hurt me, no more.” I’m not here to tell you that love is pain—this is Substack, not Tumblr. But maybe they’re reluctant twins?
Q: Are you in love?
A: Short answer: no. Confusing counterquestion to encourage you to subscribe: aren’t we all?
Q: Do you love love?
A: Love and I are in a weird place, hence this month-long project. If you’re looking for butterflies and heartwarmth, I recommend XO, Kitty or Heartstopper. If you’re looking for a needlessly meaty overanalysis by an insufferable baby millennial, welcome.
Q: Where’s your head at right now?
A: Here.
additional exercises
A silly little playlist. Perhaps the thing I love most in this world is music. I’ve put together a playlist about love to go along with this series, but to be clear, this is not a compilation of love songs. I repeat, THESE ARE NOT LOVE SONGS.
Dr. Neff’s Self-Compassion Test. A little activity to get us thinking about self-love.
The series/movie you will never recover from. My newsletter on romantic love will largely be a revisitation of One Day, the 2011 movie and 2024 Netflix series inspired by the 2009 novel of the same name. I favor the series, but for the love of all things good, do not watch both close together! Unless, of course, you have nowhere to be and can afford to wallow.
That’s all, folks! Thanks for being here, and thank you for allowing me to occasionally shimmy into your inbox.
Lovingly,
Anessa